From working woman to working mother

Planning pregnancy can be challenging, especially from the viewpoint of a working woman, one who is ambitious and wants to advance in her career. One question we all want answered is, when is the perfect time to have a baby? By this I mean, is there a time in ones life and career where having a baby will cause minimal impact to your career progression or planned growth and development at work?

I hate to say it but the simple answer is no!

Well, not if you focus purely on career.

I personally don’t think there is ever a ‘perfect’ time. There will always be a reason to justify delaying a baby.

What the research tells us

The so called motherhood penalty coined by Sociologists as the opportunity cost that having a child has on women in the workplace, whereby working mothers encounter biological and cultural based disadvantages in pay, perceived competence, and benefits relative to childless women. According to the TUC there is a 7% pay gap between mothers and non mothers working full time. With the gender pay gap in mind this is understandably a big issue.

For many women having a baby can delay career progression and negatively impact lifetime earnings BUT this is not true for all working mothers, the dial is starting to move in the right direction. I have a number of mentors who are working mothers and have pushed through so many barriers to achieve amazing things in their careers. I know it certainly isn’t easy (this is an understatement!). There are inspiring female leaders that I look up to who have achieved so much in both their careers and families. 

I recently returned from a second maternity leave and decided that I would use my return to work as a transition period to seek a new role that gave me the advancement and stretch assignments I was looking for. I know each one of us is different, for many new mothers, the return to work after maternity leave is not be the right time to seek a new role or a stretch assignment but I mention it to show that having a baby can make you more focused on your WHY and therefore positively impact your career.

Focusing on career is only one small piece of the jigsaw puzzle of life. Each one of us has a biological ticking clock, and aside from this the ‘right’ time to have a baby is different for every woman. I’ve outlined some considerations from my experience should you be thinking about starting or expanding your family.

1.Stability

I don’t mean just mean financial stability!

Do you feel you have a loving and stable environment to offer a child? Having a 6 bedroom house and thousands of pounds in the bank is great if you have it, but it’s not a requisite. There really is no right answer, but a roof over your head and a means to provide the basics are important. It is also important to consider not just where you are now but where you expect to be in 2, 5, 10 years etc.

2. Priorities

Do you feel like all else held constant you would do it right away? Life is full of hard decisions, what is your biggest priority in life? What are the 1-2 things that you are not willing to negotiate in your future? The answers to these questions will help you prioritise what is most important to you. The next step is factoring in restraints such as time, for example have you visited a fertility specialist ?  (this is not a must for everyone, but dependent on your age may be a consideration to determine the time flexibility available to you).

3. You matter most

Whether you are due for a promotion or are considering how your boss and colleagues would react, note that others (including those who love you) will always have an opinion. What’s important is what matters most to YOU!

I have spoken to so many friends who found out they were pregnant and then stressed about the timing not being ideal for their manger or team. I confess I also did this too! Remember, companies make budget cuts and redundancies when they see fit, rarely will they consider the affected individuals and delay such plans. Similarly I believe when it is the most desirable time for you to have a baby, if you can, do it! 

Just an FYI, it is not ok for anyone to make you feel bad about being pregnant or that taking maternity leave is burdensome to the firm. Thankfully there are laws that protect women during pregnancy and whilst on maternity from discrimination at work.

This is the first post in a series focusing on the working mother a topic I am so so passionate about. Next up we’ll discuss being pregnant at work! 

Let me know what areas of pregnancy or being a working mother are of most interest.